Favorite Comedian

The long lost Steven Wright was back on Comedy Central last night. I haven't seen him in many years and have missed his unique and mildly twisted sense of humor.

He is one of those comedians that can suppress his laughter and tend to make himself sound mildly depressed and delivers his sometimes confusing one liners in a monotone voice.

Here are a couple of great ones from last nights show.

"I always wished I could have made "quote" the first word I had ever spoken... that way when I was about to die I could say... "unquote".

"I saw a hitchhiker carrying a sign that said "Heaven" on it... so I ran him over. I think he got to his destination... he looked like a nice person".

"I have been working on getting in touch with my self conscience, but every once in a while I speak fluently in a foreign language so that it doesn't know what I am saying".

"I am writing an unauthorized autobiography... I am going to have it published and then sue myself".

"If heat rises, wouldn't Heaven be hotter than hell?"

Here is a couple of old favorites:
"You know that feeling you get when you lean back to far in a chair and you are about to fall?
I feel like that all the time".

"I woke up this morning and someone had replaced everything in my house with an exact replica... I called my friend and told him and he said "who are you?"